mujh se pehli si mohabbat meray mehbub na maang
Don't ask me for the love I once gave you, my love

mein ne samjha tha kay tu hai to darakhshaan hai hayaat
I had thought if I had you, life would shine eternally on me
tera gham hai to gham-e-dahar ka jhagdra kya hai
If I had your sorrows, those of the universe would mean nothing
teri surat se hai aalam mein bahaaron ko sabaat
Your face would bring permanence to every spring
teri aankhon ke sivaa duniya mein rakkha kya hai
What is there but your eyes to see in the world anyway

tu jo mil jaaye to taqdir niguun ho jaaye
If I found you, my fate would bow down to me

yun na tha mein ne faqat chahaa tha yun ho jaaye
This was not how it was, it was merely how I wished it to be
aur bhii dukh hain zamaane mein mohabbat ke sivaa
There are other heartaches in the world than those of love
raahaten aur bhi vasl ki raahat ke sivaa
There is happiness other than the joy of union
anaginat sadiyon ki taarik bahimanaa talism
The dreadful magic of uncountable dark years
resham-o-atalas-o-kamkhvaab mein bunavaaye huye
Woven in silk, satin and brocade
jaa-ba-jaa bikate huye kuuchaa-o-baazaar mein jism
In every corner are bodies sold in the market
khaak mein lithade huye khuun mein nahalaaye huye
Covered in dust, bathed in blood

jism nikale huye amaraaz ke tannuuron se
Bodies retrieved from the cauldrons of disease
piip bahatii hu_ii galate huye naasuuron se
Discharge flowing from their rotten ulcers
laut jaati hai udhar ko bhi nazar kyaa kije
Still returns my gaze in that direction, what can be done
ab bhi dilkash hai tera husn magar kya kije
Even now your beauty is tantalizing, but what can be done

aur bhii dukh hain zamaane mein mohabbat ke sivaa
There are other heartaches in the world than those of love
raahaten aur bhi vasl ki raahat ke sivaa
There is happiness other than the joy of union
mujh se pehli si mohabbat meray mehbub na maang
Don't ask me for the love I once gave you, my love

The senses are numbed. The mind is wandering the oft traversed space between sleep and wakefulness. Its been a long time since I summoned courage, more importantly the will to push my body to the limit, to drive my mind such that all desires, all passions become but mere passing thoughts in the continuum of wakeful consciousness. There has been pain, anger, happiness, sadness, frustration and the sweet release of shouting on top of my voice (not to the outside world but to the inner self) that I am alive all in the course of a couple of days. There have been times when I used to think, rather pray to extricate myself from the throngs of monotony. Now, life is running right past my eyes giving me no time to sit, relax and take stock of where I am heading. There is just a continuous unidirectional movement which is dragging me along, like a small fish caught in a strong current in the ocean I am unable to make sense of my destination. Life has been greatful in a lot of ways, yet the long journey and its natural unpredictable course fills me with both amazement and fear at the same time. I am amazed at how things turn out when we are least expecting them and at the same time fear the loss of these possessions which fortune has so kindly bestowed...